TO VENT OR NOT TO VENT
PROVERBS 29:11
PROVERBS 29:11 NKJ
A fool vents all his feelings,
But a wise man holds them back.
One of the basic tenets of modern psychology is to "let it out." The idea that all your feelings should be expressed, that you need someone you can vent with.
But in looking at this verse, the Scriptures offer a totally different perspective. A fool, one who does not deal wisely in the affairs of life, is the one who vents his feelings. The wise person is the one who holds them back.
This proverb is a powerful reminder that our words are important. When we vent, give free expression to a strong emotion, we are often expressing words with anger, remorse, and negativity. And none of those are seeds we really want to plant in our lives or in the lives of those close to us. So instead of letting it all out, hold it back and wait until you can express words of faith and love.
APPLICATION
About 20 years ago, I attended a seminar for pastors. At this seminar, the leader encouraged us to find someone we could vent to. I chose Joy. She did not appreciate being selected as the chosen one and strongly suggested that I abandon that counsel. In one of my wiser decisions, I stopped venting.
Really if we are going to pour out our hearts and talk about our feelings, no one is better equipped to handle that than the Lord. But we are expressing our heart with the intent of coming to a solution, and we certainly do not blame the Lord for our negative feelings. We may express our situation to Him, but we do it with honor and respect and a confidence that He can help.
A good friend of mine says that when we vent negative emotions, we are not letting that negativity out; we are actually letting it in.
ACTION POINT
Be wise; don't vent.